Suspended, the state of things

//Suspended, the state of things

Suspended, the state of things

I’m facing the computer screen, thinking and dreaming, writing an interminable book proposal, deep in thoughts about who we are, how we are, what we are. The cat’s asleep as usual beside my desk. All is in its place. Then there’s the key in the door and my son arrives. Suddenly all that had been so present is not so much « gone » in a flash as it is « suspended, » or « other: » His mobile telephone has been stolen.
Waves of a thousand emotions surge forth in me and in him, crashing chaotically. Confusion. Anger. Fear. Rage. Indignation. Impotence. Frustration. Righteousness. Pain. Doubt. Sorrow. Despair. Disgust. A desire to « know » what happened. As if « knowing » would undo what we know cannot be undone.
Then what is to be done is formalities, the « easy » part, the punching in of numbers and information, « suspending » what had been « his » so that the thief cannot benefit from what is « not his. »
Now, back at the desk, with the thoughts, words, cat, papers and books, all in its place, my son in the next room preparing his things for a major exam tomorrow, the sense of « suspension » is different, not isolated or momentary or sudden, but rather fluid and pervasive, as if the state of things, of everything, is always to be « suspended, » to be kept hanging, unfixed. Quite simply: unknown.

By | 2015-10-02T16:27:48+01:00 mars 9th, 2011|Textes|8 Comments

About the Author:

Enseignante Zen et poète, Sensei Amy “Tu es cela” Hollowell est née et a grandi à Minneapolis, aux Etats-Unis. Arrivée en France en 1981 pour étudier la littérature et l’histoire, elle y est restée, s’installant à Paris, où elle élève ses deux enfants et gagne sa vie en tant que journaliste. The Zen teacher and poet Amy “Tu es cela” Hollowell Sensei was born and raised in Minneapolis, but came to France in 1981 to study literature and history and has lived in Paris ever since, raising her two children and making a living as a journalist.


  1. Tu es cela 11 mars 2011 at 22 h 47 min - Reply

    So then the question is: What is "monkey mind"? Who is the "monkey"?

  2. Juan 11 mars 2011 at 17 h 44 min - Reply

    That’s what I ment to say.

  3. tu es cela 11 mars 2011 at 11 h 18 min - Reply

    or is it that "not sewing » is a result or a symptom of what you call monkey mind?

  4. Juan 11 mars 2011 at 8 h 10 min - Reply

    I would put it in another way not to mess with the different meanings of suspension: not sewing is monkey mind.

  5. Tu es cela 10 mars 2011 at 19 h 04 min - Reply

    So "not sewing" is "suspension" and "sewing" is "not suspension"?

  6. Juan 10 mars 2011 at 12 h 07 min - Reply

    There’re too many request during the day to work on it and late in the night there’s not enough patience or eyes to work on it…

  7. tu es cela 10 mars 2011 at 11 h 08 min - Reply

    What would it mean to "restore it from suspension"?

  8. Juan 10 mars 2011 at 10 h 41 min - Reply

    Pretty much like my Rakusu, keeps hanging from suspension to suspension, only that after the hectic part I’m too tired to restore it from suspension as it is too late in the evening

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