A conference at the Cinémathèque was billed as « A cinema lesson, » given by the actor/director/counterculture hero Dennis Hopper. It ends up being Hopper just chatting about Hopper and his (famous) buddies. Not much about the art of cinema. A few film clips. He wows the audience by crying as a demonstration of « method acting. » I’m disappointed.
Later I recall Zen master Bankei:
« My only miracle is that I eat when I am hungry and that I drink when I am thirsty. »
Yes !
and it is not easy sometimes !
Primula of course you’re right and I should mind my own business.
The story of Maezumi (my perception of it) reminded me of this lesson I learned a few years ago in a different situation (which may be why I was upset).
You can not say:
”I have no time for you now, mother, wife, neighbour and child. I have to go and serve the Dharma. My life revolves around the Dharma!”
Because your life ìs the Dharma. And all these people you abandon are part of your life.
The people around me and the work I do on one side are not separated form practicing the Dharma on the other side. If I make such a separation it is an insult to the Dharma and to the people around me and the work I do.
Every time we believe in Santa Claus – we will have to experience his fall?
The disapointment will be as big as our expectations? (read our fear)
Our teacher can give us "something"???
We can "follow" to get "there"???
As long as we don’t accept our existential lonelyness – we ourself have to go our way – we will be disapointed? (glad to fool ourself)
A teacher is just a travelcompanion? A very important one! Who goes besides us. Teaching : there is "no-thing" to give? there is no-where to get?
I did see the video on Maezumi to.
I don’t know all those things you are writing.
If it is true, i can understand your disapointment –
And i like it a lot the way you try to see things realy as they are –
we are all conditioned to make things pritty-er and soft… becous they hurt to much…
But I don’t know if it is constructive to anyone to analyse the private life of someone on this website?
Some things are only said from person to person? – so there is a reponsability involved? So we are there for the other?
Okay, two more things related to Maezumi, not about him directly.
I’m just upset; what can I do.
One thing is that in 1995 Genpo didn’t tell us that Maezumi drowned in a hot-tub because he was to drunk to keep his head above the water.
He talked about how modest and unselfish Maezumi was. Bullshit like Maezumi hadn’t bought new pants in forty years or so.
I suppose he didn’t tell lies but the information was misleading. Something likes the McCain campaign.
The other thing is Maezumi’s widow. My goodness she was such a doormat all these years. And even now she says “Maezumi teaches me in my dreams.”
I’d like to say to here. Get a life! After all you’ve sacrificed get a life of your own!
My last comment on Maezumi (and on this post):
April 24, 1999
While playing in a golf tournament, Elway tells a Denver TV station that he is retiring, saying: "For so many years everything in my family has revolved around me. It’s time for that to change. I really accomplished everything I wanted to. There’s no real upside to coming back.”
John Elway is no enlightened teacher. He’s a quarterback. A good one.
Ting, now look what you did; you made me cry!
Idolizing people is a guarantee for disappointment.
Hopper is an old and self absorbed former hippie. Maezumi was a sex obsessed and alcoholic lousy father.
And at this point I should take a look in the mirror and cut to pieces this biggest idol of mine called me.
But unfortunately I have to go to work now.
Appreciate your drink. Appreciate your life.
Last evening I watched – for the first time – this documentary about Maezumi Roshi, who died in 1995.
If I remember correctly in 1995 there was this sesshin in a place called Birdsong (where you could distinctly here the song of metal birds approaching the airport).
Maezumi had died weeks or months before. There was some kind of ceremony; we all recited a sutra over and over; we all walked up to a photo of Maezumi and bowed; offered incense. That sort of thing. People got emotional.
I never knew Maezumi or supposed flaws in his character.
There’s really nothing I can say about the guy.
But leaving Maezumi aside I wonder:
We don’t have to be saints to appreciate our lives. Perfection is to be found in the imperfect. That’s fine.
But what if we fuck up our lives completely? If we harm ourselves and others thoroughly?
I call that a problem.
And yes, we can appreciate our lives, wherever we are, but making some minor adjustments to reduce the harm we are doing is not a bad idea either. Don’t you think?